Empowered or Fear?

I just took a stand in my Temple Membership and Marketing Committee. It's a silly stand, and really nothing comes from it. There is renewed discussion on changing website template platforms for the temple. It was discussed previously and decided that it was not a good idea to make the switch. Fast forward 6 months and a new committee chair and suddenly we're in discussions again.

This is a bad idea. My husband said as much, but he's an "employee" of the temple, so he can say his opinion, but gets steamrolled a lot. I've been in his shoes. My last job I was the temple "employee" (different temple) and if I was resistant to a change I was a bad and difficult employee.

Now I'm not the employee but the committee member. I am a volunteer. It's a volunteer organization, and honestly, one that we will not be attached too in the future, as my husband won't be an employee there much longer, and we're probably moving far far away.

So why do I care so much? Why do I send a lengthy email to the committee stating my concerns and suggestions to again NOT go down that road.

And why now is there a huge knot in my stomach for putting myself out there? They can't fire me. I can quit the committee. I can stop caring about the temple and future administrators. That's for the future generations to battle.

I so want people to hear me, and accept that what I have to say, what I have to offer matters.

They may all end up jumping all over me and telling me I suck. Honestly, that would be fine. Would make quitting the committee easier.

So then I ask... why the stomach knots?

Am I empowered for stating my mind, or fearful of rejection and not winning this battle. And so what if I lose? So what if I win.

It's small stuff and I'm sitting here sweating it.

I know better.

Don't sweat the small stuff, and it's ALL small stuff.