It's SUNNY and NICE and NOT RAINING!!! Woo Hoo!!!
Took the family over to the Church Street Marketplace downtown. We got outside, and window shopped. Spent entirely too much money on some chocolate covered strawberries, and enjoyed street musicians, climbing boulders, splashing in a fountain, making new friends on the street, and generally having a lovely afternoon.
Natalya, in spite of her protests, is snoozing away on the couch. Craig is relaxing (there's a wonderful concept) and I just bought new sneakers online with a gift certificate Craig gave me.
Soon there is laundry and BBQ, and lunches to make for tomorrow, but in the now, there is a/c, and quiet peace in the house. Ahhhhhh, I love days like this.
So embracing this sunny day!!! It's been so long since we saw ye sunshine.
Monday, May 30, 2011
Sunday, May 29, 2011
Kung Fu 2
Getting out of the house today. Wasn't feeling spectacular yesterday, so still taking it "easy", and will be seeing Kung Fu Panda 2 with the family today. Craig let me sleep in, and that was spectacular. Love that man of mine!!!
Friday, May 27, 2011
Saturday, May 21, 2011
Friday ~ Really???
What a day I had!
Craig could not resist me any longer and "took" me that morning. (I am irresistible) As we're hot and heavy, we both hear a tiny tiny voice... "daddy??? what are you doing??" OMG, my kid walked in on us!
Now having scar'd my child for life, Craig escorted her to the living room to watch cartoons, then back to our room where we tried to regain our composure.
Off to work, my computer is broken. Had to stand over my desk while the IT guy tried to fix it. Frustrating.
Craig and I had our "lunch date", but sort of got to minor bickering and nitpicking at each other. Off putting, and not as pleasant as I was hoping it was going to be.
Friday night, oh what a night...
We went to Costco in a thunderstorm, so I could officially get my computer glasses refilled with the newest prescription. And get them back sooner rather than later. Now being told a week and a half! Before it was 3-4 days.
Also, my distance glasses got the anti reflection coating screwed up, so i turned those over too, to get fixed (3rd time getting this pair done in 2 month's time).
AND I didn't remember my back up spare pair of specs, so we finished up our costco shopping with me blind as a bat. It was not fun, and we all got on each other's nerves. My head was splitting and Natalya wanted to stay there to eat. Made that clear with her whines. I could not see! We took a pizza home, where I found my older glasses, but man what a difference a week made... now I'm in my old pair, and I can see, but just barely. These scripts are so different.
Still, better than nothing at all, but I sure hope this will be the last visit to the costco optical dept.
Then.... my new bathing suit, the one I ordered in MARCH, finally arrived. Back order hell. I tried it on, and my boobs spill out! Crap! So I look to see if I can get one in the next size up, and they have them, but the price went up $20 from when I bought it back in March!
Called their customer service, and they took care of it, getting another suit, at my original price and won't have to pay the shipping. But man! What a bummer, right???
So I'm still waiting....... just now laughing at myself.
It certainly was "a day".
Craig could not resist me any longer and "took" me that morning. (I am irresistible) As we're hot and heavy, we both hear a tiny tiny voice... "daddy??? what are you doing??" OMG, my kid walked in on us!
Now having scar'd my child for life, Craig escorted her to the living room to watch cartoons, then back to our room where we tried to regain our composure.
Off to work, my computer is broken. Had to stand over my desk while the IT guy tried to fix it. Frustrating.
Craig and I had our "lunch date", but sort of got to minor bickering and nitpicking at each other. Off putting, and not as pleasant as I was hoping it was going to be.
Friday night, oh what a night...
We went to Costco in a thunderstorm, so I could officially get my computer glasses refilled with the newest prescription. And get them back sooner rather than later. Now being told a week and a half! Before it was 3-4 days.
Also, my distance glasses got the anti reflection coating screwed up, so i turned those over too, to get fixed (3rd time getting this pair done in 2 month's time).
AND I didn't remember my back up spare pair of specs, so we finished up our costco shopping with me blind as a bat. It was not fun, and we all got on each other's nerves. My head was splitting and Natalya wanted to stay there to eat. Made that clear with her whines. I could not see! We took a pizza home, where I found my older glasses, but man what a difference a week made... now I'm in my old pair, and I can see, but just barely. These scripts are so different.
Still, better than nothing at all, but I sure hope this will be the last visit to the costco optical dept.
Then.... my new bathing suit, the one I ordered in MARCH, finally arrived. Back order hell. I tried it on, and my boobs spill out! Crap! So I look to see if I can get one in the next size up, and they have them, but the price went up $20 from when I bought it back in March!
Called their customer service, and they took care of it, getting another suit, at my original price and won't have to pay the shipping. But man! What a bummer, right???
So I'm still waiting....... just now laughing at myself.
It certainly was "a day".
Thursday, May 19, 2011
Just got Praised!
So yeah, made me feel good and gushie inside. I helped a company that I work with every month get their financial's mostly cleaned up and allowed them a significant refund this month, so they're VERY happy and singing my praises.
Now if I could get them to sing my praises to my supervisors....
Oh well, at least I know they're (this company) is super happy with me at the moment, and that's enough to take some of my stress from this week away.
Ahhhh. Now to chill out and wait for 5pm... good lord that's hours away! Boo!
I wonder if there is something to watch on TV (aka netflix, hbogo, xfinity tv - goodness I have way too much access to TV!)
Hope you are all having a nice day too.
Now if I could get them to sing my praises to my supervisors....
Oh well, at least I know they're (this company) is super happy with me at the moment, and that's enough to take some of my stress from this week away.
Ahhhh. Now to chill out and wait for 5pm... good lord that's hours away! Boo!
I wonder if there is something to watch on TV (aka netflix, hbogo, xfinity tv - goodness I have way too much access to TV!)
Hope you are all having a nice day too.
Monday, May 16, 2011
The Evil Advil
Ok, so I did this to myself. Back has been hurting, chalk it up to AF joys. Taking Advil's to help with the pain and keep the flow in check. It's working great! All except for the lovely tummy upset I'm now having today. Yes, the EVIL ADVIL has caught up with me and now I'm miserable.
I WANT to be with hubby, at least my mind does. My tummy has other ideas. Like soup and crackers for dinner. Keep it blah, keep the heating pad near by.
Sigh.
WHY oh why do I do this to myself again and again? Upped my asacol intake today, as well as my imodium. Now nursing a wicked headache, and really could happily crawl back into bed.
Not yet.
At the office. Caught up as best as I can be with work in process. Everything else is pending.
So I'm now thinking about eating some bland toast, and dreaming of snuggling under my blankets at home.
I am freezing. It's pouring rain outside. Wish I had a blanket here. Wishing I had a mattress and pillow here.
It's 3 hours until quitting time. Can't wait.
Chilling out (literally!)
I WANT to be with hubby, at least my mind does. My tummy has other ideas. Like soup and crackers for dinner. Keep it blah, keep the heating pad near by.
Sigh.
WHY oh why do I do this to myself again and again? Upped my asacol intake today, as well as my imodium. Now nursing a wicked headache, and really could happily crawl back into bed.
Not yet.
At the office. Caught up as best as I can be with work in process. Everything else is pending.
So I'm now thinking about eating some bland toast, and dreaming of snuggling under my blankets at home.
I am freezing. It's pouring rain outside. Wish I had a blanket here. Wishing I had a mattress and pillow here.
It's 3 hours until quitting time. Can't wait.
Chilling out (literally!)
Sunday, May 15, 2011
Lazy Sunday
Today is a better re-charging day. Still in my PJs at just before 2pm, and we're all having a great relaxing day. It's cold, windy, and rainy, and will be rainy for the next 8-10 days, so at least my pollen sneezes are getting a break.
I did get to pick up my new new glasses yesterday, so just trying to get used to them again.
Watching "Harry and the Henderson's" at the moment with the family, so will probably get my weep on at the end when George sends Harry back to the woods. Get's me every time.
And totally unrelated... enjoy another LAZY SUNDAY:
I did get to pick up my new new glasses yesterday, so just trying to get used to them again.
Watching "Harry and the Henderson's" at the moment with the family, so will probably get my weep on at the end when George sends Harry back to the woods. Get's me every time.
And totally unrelated... enjoy another LAZY SUNDAY:
Daphene
My daughter found a stone, named it Daphene, painted her blue with sparkly blue nail polish, and is now setting out to make a comfy bed/home for her.
Saturday, May 14, 2011
My batteries are NOT recharging
I really was looking forward to resting this weekend. It's been a whirlwind 2 weeks. I'm super exhausted and need a break. I wanted to just sleep and chill out this weekend, re-charge my batteries.
Craig had to go to an early morning meeting, and was gone all morning and a bit into the afternoon. He told Natalya to let me sleep. She did not. Seconds after he left she woke me up.
I've been go go go all day. I'm losing it. My batteries are NOT recharging.
I think I just need a good cry!
I'm not really sad, just hormonal. Short fuse, exhausted and not getting any rest. That's my fault though.
I need to lock myself away and just watch a sad sappy movie and give myself a good hard girly cry. I swear I'd be a new person if I could just get my weep on.
Craig had to go to an early morning meeting, and was gone all morning and a bit into the afternoon. He told Natalya to let me sleep. She did not. Seconds after he left she woke me up.
I've been go go go all day. I'm losing it. My batteries are NOT recharging.
I think I just need a good cry!
I'm not really sad, just hormonal. Short fuse, exhausted and not getting any rest. That's my fault though.
I need to lock myself away and just watch a sad sappy movie and give myself a good hard girly cry. I swear I'd be a new person if I could just get my weep on.
Tuesday, May 10, 2011
Monday, May 9, 2011
Spotting?
Think it's all over - finally. spotting I think. must not be PG. I'm going to crawl into a corner and cry now.
Waiting and Wondering
Couldn't sleep last night. Up at 1:30am when I just started sobbing. No reason, just sobbing. What is wrong with me???? Weirdest LP ever!
Still no AF today, but didn't bother to test. Also, felt nauseas last night and this morning. So fricking annoying!
The thing is... I really do want to be PG now. And think it's unfair to make my head believe that I am, knowing with so many BFN's and different brand BFN's that these phantom symptoms are just that, not real, and AF is being mean to me this month. It's really tweaking my head, and I'm walking around in a dazed fog. Where is AF? Why is she late? What is the bigger issue if I'm not going to be PG, then what is all of this.
It's all consuming, and I wish it wasn't. I wish I didn't know when AF was due, then I would just be blissfully unaware she was late, and not be wasting my time, money, stress, and efforts. Crying, nauseousness, fatigue?
And obsessively looking at the TP when I go to the restroom for any hint of AF. NADA.
I should be rejoicing, no AF means no cramps, no other AF yuckiness. My hormones are in overdrive. I seriously need a NAP!
Still no AF today, but didn't bother to test. Also, felt nauseas last night and this morning. So fricking annoying!
The thing is... I really do want to be PG now. And think it's unfair to make my head believe that I am, knowing with so many BFN's and different brand BFN's that these phantom symptoms are just that, not real, and AF is being mean to me this month. It's really tweaking my head, and I'm walking around in a dazed fog. Where is AF? Why is she late? What is the bigger issue if I'm not going to be PG, then what is all of this.
It's all consuming, and I wish it wasn't. I wish I didn't know when AF was due, then I would just be blissfully unaware she was late, and not be wasting my time, money, stress, and efforts. Crying, nauseousness, fatigue?
And obsessively looking at the TP when I go to the restroom for any hint of AF. NADA.
I should be rejoicing, no AF means no cramps, no other AF yuckiness. My hormones are in overdrive. I seriously need a NAP!
Saturday, May 7, 2011
Where ARE you???
My cycles typically last 29 days, post surgery. Before the surgery, could go up to 31 days, but rarely past that. If I did ovulate, I will get AF exactly 14 days later. That's the constant, the LP. If I had/have an anovulatory cycle, who knows when AF will come, right? I put in an "o" cover line on the FF chart to guestimate how many days left in my LP this cycle, so my dpo at CD 31 is 11, but is a guess at best. Used the 2nd day of cramping I had end of April. IF that cramping was O cramping... makes me where I am today.
My 1st and 2nd PG, I tested at probably 15-20 dpo and got my BFP. My last PG I tested at what I thought was 12 dpo and had my BFP. All three times when I thought AF due, but not here.
Last time I was "late" with constant BFN's, turned out I o'd really late so my 2ww turned into a 3ww and AF showed up 5 days later then expected.
All I know is I don't have AF here presently, and consider myself now late, but I also know the 2 tests have been BFN, which probably makes it more likely I'm not PG, just a late O and AF will be along shortly.
Then a tiny voice tells me, maybe it's a bad batch of tests. FRER tests have usually always been pretty honest to me. So a BFN, while disappointing, is probably the truth.
I have 1 answer test and I may use it tomorrow, but then that leaves me open to disappointment a 3rd day in a row.
Would be lovely to have a mother's day BFP, but a mother's day BFN?? I don't want to be moody and sad tomorrow, you know?
I haven't been sad about the BFN's just more baffled. If it's BFN, then where is AF already?
It's an exciting and frustrating time for me. The not knowing, I get to "be pregnant" at least a little longer... If AF comes, it's a nasty slap to reality that I'm not.
So for now I'm in my moment. Taking it with stride. Enjoying my imaginary symptoms, and hoping those imagined become true and real soon enough. Maybe it's my turn, maybe not. Just going with the flow (hah! Pun) so to speak.
My 1st and 2nd PG, I tested at probably 15-20 dpo and got my BFP. My last PG I tested at what I thought was 12 dpo and had my BFP. All three times when I thought AF due, but not here.
Last time I was "late" with constant BFN's, turned out I o'd really late so my 2ww turned into a 3ww and AF showed up 5 days later then expected.
All I know is I don't have AF here presently, and consider myself now late, but I also know the 2 tests have been BFN, which probably makes it more likely I'm not PG, just a late O and AF will be along shortly.
Then a tiny voice tells me, maybe it's a bad batch of tests. FRER tests have usually always been pretty honest to me. So a BFN, while disappointing, is probably the truth.
I have 1 answer test and I may use it tomorrow, but then that leaves me open to disappointment a 3rd day in a row.
Would be lovely to have a mother's day BFP, but a mother's day BFN?? I don't want to be moody and sad tomorrow, you know?
I haven't been sad about the BFN's just more baffled. If it's BFN, then where is AF already?
It's an exciting and frustrating time for me. The not knowing, I get to "be pregnant" at least a little longer... If AF comes, it's a nasty slap to reality that I'm not.
So for now I'm in my moment. Taking it with stride. Enjoying my imaginary symptoms, and hoping those imagined become true and real soon enough. Maybe it's my turn, maybe not. Just going with the flow (hah! Pun) so to speak.
Wednesday, May 4, 2011
Moody moody moody!
I'm crabby today, and was last night too. Maybe starting the weight loss plan this week was a bad idea. Family coming in, DH's MBA graduation Friday, much to still do, and tons of stress there.
Then, Will AF be here tomorrow or not????
Since last night I didn't eat nearly enough, I got to treat myself to a small ice cream for dessert, but DH went over his budget so he couldn't have any. I felt like a dirt bag for eating in front of him, and emotions were high. He really wanted dessert but knew he needed to resist, and put his big boy pants on. I am really proud of him, but felt like crap at the same time.
Bad Me!
Oh and I'm breaking out (acne) in weird places... back of my neck, frown lines near my mouth and one in my ear! WTH? I don't usually break out when AF comes, so I have no clue what that's all about.
I'm not craving chocolate, hope that is a good sign too.
I checked my CM last night expecting it to seem more EW as that's the way it seems just before AF, but nope. Was sticky-ish/cream.
To sum up: moody, clumsy, oddish break outs, no chocolate cravings, no sore bb, and sticky-ish cm last evening.
All of this to mess with my head I think. I predict AF will not be here tomorrow (as scheduled), but will come, and be late enough to drive me insane!
Then, Will AF be here tomorrow or not????
Since last night I didn't eat nearly enough, I got to treat myself to a small ice cream for dessert, but DH went over his budget so he couldn't have any. I felt like a dirt bag for eating in front of him, and emotions were high. He really wanted dessert but knew he needed to resist, and put his big boy pants on. I am really proud of him, but felt like crap at the same time.
Bad Me!
Oh and I'm breaking out (acne) in weird places... back of my neck, frown lines near my mouth and one in my ear! WTH? I don't usually break out when AF comes, so I have no clue what that's all about.
I'm not craving chocolate, hope that is a good sign too.
I checked my CM last night expecting it to seem more EW as that's the way it seems just before AF, but nope. Was sticky-ish/cream.
To sum up: moody, clumsy, oddish break outs, no chocolate cravings, no sore bb, and sticky-ish cm last evening.
All of this to mess with my head I think. I predict AF will not be here tomorrow (as scheduled), but will come, and be late enough to drive me insane!
Tuesday, May 3, 2011
Eat LESS and EXERCISE
We're trying the "eat less and exercise" method. lol. This is what I did when I lost the 70 pounds to get PG with Natalya. Yes, 70 pounds! Sadly since having her 4.5 years ago, I've gained back most of it. Sigh. I'm needing to start all over. I remember everything feeling better when I was thinner, and would like to get to there again. I have no excuse anymore. We have a fitness center in our apt, right across the hall from us. And yet we've never used it! LAME!
Looking at my food journal for today, I think my problem is the same as before, I'm not eating enough. Therefore I go into starvation survival mode and store my fat, instead of losing it. Maybe I'll ride the exercise bike tonight? Or at least pull out the Wii Fit! Got to start somewhere.
I just know that when I get home, my child is on high energy, and it's exhausting. By time she's finally in bed (8ish) I'm spent. I take my shower, and climb into bed to watch a little TV with Craig until I can manage to fall asleep.
Lazy lifestyle at best.
You know, I made a resolution to work on my health this year. Operation, done; check. Now time to do this. I've been putting it off for too long. Today is the day! (now to see if I can back up all this "talk")
Looking at my food journal for today, I think my problem is the same as before, I'm not eating enough. Therefore I go into starvation survival mode and store my fat, instead of losing it. Maybe I'll ride the exercise bike tonight? Or at least pull out the Wii Fit! Got to start somewhere.
I just know that when I get home, my child is on high energy, and it's exhausting. By time she's finally in bed (8ish) I'm spent. I take my shower, and climb into bed to watch a little TV with Craig until I can manage to fall asleep.
Lazy lifestyle at best.
You know, I made a resolution to work on my health this year. Operation, done; check. Now time to do this. I've been putting it off for too long. Today is the day! (now to see if I can back up all this "talk")
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